my experiences

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What’s Really Behind Decision-Making

The other day my wife, Lily, and I decided to look at living room furniture. We are on a little bit of a roll right now, just completing the final touches of our bathroom renovation that got downgraded to painting and changing a light fixture.

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Still, being in that remodelling mood, we decided to look at a couch Lily has been eyeing for ten years or more. I think there’s a few reasons we ended up looking at the couch now.

The first reason is that I saw a rowing machine in a flyer and Lil saw my eyes get big. I also kept the flyer around and made mention of how good the price was.

When my wife sees that scenario happening it’s like a perfect storm to her. The pressure to purchase comes in waves that are unrelenting. And so to try to divert this storm, she stated that there will be no big purchases made until we get new living room furniture.

I say she’s just a wuss who can’t take a little stormy weather.

But the other reason we decided to look at furniture is that I’ve made it public that our living room couch is 28 years old. In the last few months, I’ve blogged about it, referenced it in two sermons, and the ultimate, I’ve sat on it.

Our living room furniture has lasted, but all good things come to an end and I think we are at that point with our stuff.

In no time, I found myself transported to a furniture store that Lily seemed to know quite well. In fact, she seemed to know it better than I expected her to.

She headed straight to the living room section and, before I could peel myself away from the 70 inch TV that was turned to the Olympics, she was talking to a salesperson.

She had her eyes on a sofa and, even worse, she was sitting down on it. The salesperson was a nice senior lady who seemed very accommodating. She may have recognized a sucker as soon as we entered, or maybe she was just very experienced in her work.

She agreed with us on everything we said so it seemed she was on our side and not working for the store at all.

We complained at how the love seat price was only one hundred dollars less than the sofa yet it was only two thirds the size – that means two thirds the wood, stuffing and material. What’s with that?

By the end of our visit I wanted to buy the sofa right there. I wasn’t sure whether it was because I liked it, or that I thought Lily liked it, or that I wanted to buy it from the nice lady who seemed like she really wanted to sell it to us.

I knew, however, we weren’t going to buy that day. Lil would never buy anything without checking prices in two, three or more other stores. We may also have to revisit this store a few times before we make a decision.

Then again, it may be another 10 years before we actually settle on getting new furniture.

Here’s the thing:  There are many influences on our decision-making. Today I read in my devotions that the heart is most deceitful and incurable (Jeremiah 17:9-10). It’s so easy for our hearts to be influenced away from what God wants. We need to be vigilant at constantly working with the Holy Spirit for control of our heart.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What influences you in making decisions? Leave your comment below.

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What To Do In A Hotel Fire

We’ve all heard fire alarms go off. All through grade school we have been trained in what to do when a fire alarm sounds. But what about when the fire alarm goes off in your hotel while you are staying on the fourteenth floor?

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Fourteen floors of sheer terror – doesn’t it sound like a movie? I remember seeing “Towering Inferno” in the 70’s. I’ve also grooved to the popular hit “Disco Inferno”, of that same era (google it and enjoy).

I grew up in Toronto and we would get US news from Buffalo on TV and there were always fires being reported at 6 and 11. It was either a three alarm fire in Cheektowaga or a four alarm fire in North Tonawanda, but you knew every night there was a fire burning somewhere in Buffalo.

With that kind of background and experience, I was ready when our fire alarm started ringing at about 11:45 pm. At that time, you’re kind of in for the night and I wasn’t looking forward to spending the next few hours outside, wrapped in a blanket in my skivvies.

But alarms in hotels are different. They are not meant to scare the life out of you, rather just to gently get your attention that something is not quite right.

At first I didn’t know what it was. I thought maybe the alarm was coming from somewhere in the room. In my sweep of the room, however, I realized it was clean and the noise was coming from out in the hall. Then a voice, that was muffled by our closed door, soothed us by telling us not to be alarmed, that they were investigating the problem, but not to use the elevators.

At that point, I casually went over to the door and looked at the map that indicated where we were and where the stairwell exits were. I took a careful mental note.

As I went back to the TV, I started to think about what I would take if we had to go. My computer was still in my backpack, so it would go with me. I was staying calm just like the nice man’s voice over the intercom was telling me to do about every three minutes.

Then I heard the fire engine sirens and I thought, “Hey, this might be the real thing.” Still not panicking, I started thinking about the lessons learned as a 5th grader at Rivercrest Public School.

We had to line up when the fire drill alarm resonated through the school halls. The teacher would get us ready, remind us of our exit, and to remain in single file.

I remember in high school, during a student protest, someone pulled the fire alarm and we all got out of class. That was exciting.

I was ready to run down the fourteen floors to the bottom if I had to. I often take the stairs when I make hospital visits. There’s been more than once that I’ve still been huffing and puffing walking into a patient’s room on the 10th floor.

Not long after the fire truck sirens stopped, the nice man’s voice said they had fixed the problem and thanked us for our patience. He had to repeat his announcement because the alarm sounded again!

Here’s the thing: Sometimes you just have to be ready for things that are unexpected and out of your control. You have to be able to roll with them. In life, we should be ready to meet God now, because we don’t know when things unexpected and out of our control might happen to us.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: In your experience, what has been your reaction to alarms? Leave your comment below.

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How Darkness Causes You To Stumble

I’m wondering if you can become more klutzy as you get older. I wouldn’t say that I have the greatest hand eye coordination but I’ve always been able to negotiate my way around things.

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But not last night. I was working at the church and had gone out to run an errand. When I came back, I didn’t turn on any lights except for in my office. So, by the time I was done for the night, the church was pitch black dark.

The church foyer is pretty open so I made my way across it to the stairs. I started down the stairs and right near the bottom something caught my eye. It may have been a reflection or something but I looked up and then missed the last one or two stairs.

Well that was it – it would have made a great video! I sprawled out, my computer bag went flying, and I landed hard on both knees, which are not the greatest to begin with.

I rolled on the ground for a second, waiting for the pain to subside, then stood up, grabbed my bag and left. No harm, no foul. No one saw my wipe out. I didn’t suffer any kind of injury. But I felt pretty dumb.

When I was in my teens my bedroom was in the far end of our basement. There were two flights of steps to go down, and to get to my room I had to walk through two other rooms.

Instead of turning on a light at the top of the stairs, then turning on a light in my room and going back to the top of the stairs to turn that light out again, I would just make my way to my room in the dark.

I not only had the stairs to contend with, but I had couches, lamp stands, and any number of other objects that would be in my way. But I made it; I never fell down the stairs, never banged my knee into a door frame.

What happened to me last night, I don’t know. I’m just glad I wasn’t chewing gum at the same time; it might have been a disaster.

I know some people would try to tell me that I should look where I’m going. But really, I’ve been walking for well over 50 years! I think by now I should be able to cheat on that a little bit and get away with it.

Every morning I walk down a dark hallway, turning a Q-tip in my ear, and so far I haven’t jammed my elbow against the wall and sent that Q-tip clean through to my other ear.

Maybe my fall was an isolated incident, some kind of fluke that won’t happen again. Or maybe it’s the start of a clumsiness that will find me in traction drinking through a straw!

I guess I will just have to see what happens.

Here’s the thing: In the dark, even a glint of light catches our attention. Our eyes are drawn to it. But in the light, these little glints aren’t even noticeable. God has given us a great light in the Bible, and if we will read it, know it, and use it, all the little theories, fads, and ideas won’t distract us and cause us to fall.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What is your greatest source of distraction? Leave your comment below.

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Have You Ever Got Tired Of Trying To Plan A Vacation?

I have taken a winter vacation about three times in my life. One time doesn’t count because I was in my early 20’s. At that age, you neither appreciate nor understand any benefits of a winter vacation. A great portion of your life is vacation!

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The other two winter vacations have both been in the last 14 years. One was a trip to Florida, and Disney World, near the end of a winter, and the other more recent one was a Caribbean Cruise at the beginning of a new year.

Both times I’ve told myself that this winter vacation thing is a great idea, and we should do it again. But with ten years between the first two, and four years since the last one, we really haven’t made it a habit.

There are always very good reasons why we don’t. Scheduling is a big deal. It’s not like I can just book any time and go. I have lots of arrangements to make, and then sometimes there are meetings and activities that I can’t get out of.

Money is always an issue. It would be nice to go on a winter vacation and it not affect your wallet but, no matter how cheap people say their trip was, when you start to look for a winter vacation, there are never those kinds of deals.

Lil and I decided to take a winter vacation this year to somewhere warm. At first we had big plans – some all-inclusive resort, where the beaches have white sand and the sun never stops shining.

But every place we checked looked like it would be a way more than we wanted to spend. We then had plans of using a relative’s time share, which would cut the cost down considerably. But when we looked at the dates we could go, there was nothing available.

Now things at work are changing and I may have to change my vacation dates to make it fit. I’m thinking that if we want a winter vacation it might have to involve setting up a tent in our living room for a week!

In some ways, that’s kind of Biblical. There was a festival in Israel, called the Feast of Tabernacles, where they all set up booths (tents) and lived in them for a week. Mind you, the purpose of that was to remember that God had the Israelites live in tents when they left Egypt.

I wonder if that’s where we got the idea for modern camping … where after a week of camping you begin rejoicing that you have a solid roof over your head, a bed that doesn’t stir up claustrophobic nightmares, and you can cook without lighting a match or rubbing a couple of sticks together.

Wow, I’m getting tired and fed up with trying to figure out a winter vacation. Maybe that’s the real reason we have done it so infrequently. You feel like you need another vacation from trying to plan for one.

Here’s the thing:  We often think that if God is in something, it will just fall into place. Well, sometimes things are difficult and take a lot of work, even when God is in them. Sometimes we might have doubts along the way, even when God is in it. Many times it’s not until it’s over that we can look back and say, “See, God was in it the whole time.” … Don’t give up.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What is something you had doubts about, but, in the end, saw God in it all? Leave your comment below.

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A Restaurant Service Disaster

I am wondering if there was a restaurant servers’ work slowdown last Sunday and no one made it public. It seemed like just another Sunday to me, that is, until my wife, Lily, and I went out for lunch after church.

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We had a busy afternoon ahead of us, with some hospital visiting, so we thought we would grab something to eat at a restaurant rather than going home first.

In deciding where to eat, we didn’t really want fast food, but we didn’t really want to be a long time in a restaurant, either. We were kind of in a hurry. So where do you go when you want an upgrade from burger and fries but don’t want to wait half an hour for your food? Swiss Chalet, of course.

So we got in the car and headed right there. Swiss Chalet was a perfect choice because you know what you are going to order before you enter the restaurant (at least one of us does).

When I was growing up, their entire menu could be boiled down to three options: You could order a quarter chicken white meat, or a quarter chicken dark meat. And if you were really hungry, you could order a half chicken meal.

Now they’ve added a number of other items like ribs and salads and a few others that my eyes kind of gloss over when I look at the menu.

So, when we pulled open the doors to the restaurant, I was ready to tell my waitress exactly what I wanted on my plate. Except when we got through the doors, we realized there were several other people waiting to be seated.

I was a little surprised at this because it was after 1:00 pm, so the noon rush should have been over by then. But I thought, “This is no problem; it’s Swiss Chalet. This line will clear out in no time.”

And sure enough, we didn’t wait more than about 5 minutes before we were shown to our table.  However, on our way to our table, I noticed there was a whole section that was empty, and in the back of my mind I wondered why we had to wait to be seated.

We sat down and I did my usual thing of turning the pages of the menu, not really looking at anything, and then closing it again … because, of course, I already knew what I was going to order.

It was about then that I noticed a few things. There were no waitresses in sight. No one came to ask us if we wanted something to drink. I started to get a bad feeling that if we stayed we would be there all afternoon.

We actually decided to try another restaurant. Others stayed, but we left – no waitress had noticed us come in anyway. The crazy thing was, on our way out there was another line up of people by the entrance waiting to be seated.

If only they knew there was just a hostess working that day, and there wouldn’t be anyone to take their order.

Here’s the thing: We can get conditioned to just accept things in our lives, even things that are wrong in God’s eyes. Don’t just accept those sins as things you can’t do anything about.  Recognize they are wrong and make a move to get rid of them.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What is something that you have just put up with in your life?  Leave your comment below.

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How Your Purchases Make An Impact

Have you ever thought how much we consumers are getting ripped off in our purchases? I know everyone has to make a living, and demand will drive the price of a product, but I hate paying more than I have to.

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Recently, I purchased an optical audio cable through Amazon. The price was unbelievable at $2.99 so I had to order it. I should have ordered 100 and gone into business. The same cable at Best Buy or Future Shop would have cost me between $25 and $35.

How can I possibly get that cable at such a low price unless someone is making about 90% profit on it or there is some factory worker in China making about $.50 a day?

I can see it all happening … Some guy wakes up at about 4 am, rolls up his sleeping matt in his thatched roof home that’s on stilts in the country. He gets on his bicycle and rides down dirt roads, past flooded rice fields, and arrives at a huge factory at about 6 am.

He puts on his uniform and joins an assembly line of people putting together wires they have never seen before, have no idea what they are for, and have no use for them themselves.

He then repeats that ritual six days per week to provide for his family.

Meanwhile, I’m waiting about 4-6 weeks (feels like 46 weeks) for this piece of wire to arrive in the mail. I’m happy that I finally have it now, but I was really tempted about two weeks in to just break down and purchase the cable at full price.

I’d also be okay paying $25 for the cable if I knew that someone in perhaps Aylmer, Ontario was in his garage hand-making these cables, one at a time. But my suspicion tells me that all these cables are made in China by the same guy who’s making $.50 per day.

I guess I shouldn’t be too quick to make these assumptions; I haven’t even tried the cable out yet. What if my 3 buck audio cord doesn’t even work? I didn’t by it from a store where I can take it back. I can’t call up the factory worker in China who made the thing; he may not even have electricity in his hut, for all I know.

One comforting thing is that, for the amount of time it took for my package to arrive, it shows that their postal service is as bad or worse than ours. And there was some saving in the packaging.

The cable in the store was all packaged in a box, with a see-through window to view the product. It was attractive and gave all kinds of information about the product, probably including where it was made. My product came in a small knock-off ziplock bag, inside a 4×6 bubble pack envelope.

There was no product information, but the bag was clear plastic so I could see the entire product. I’m happy that I only paid a fraction of what it would have cost me in the store … I’m just saying there’s a rip-off going on somewhere!

Here’s the thing:  Regardless of what cable I purchase, I’m making an impact on someone. The difference is in the kind of impact I’m going to make. And you can live in such a way that your faith shows up very little in your life or you can live in a way that your faith is very prominent in your life. You will have an impact on people, either way. What kind of an impact do you want to make?

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What kind of impact does your life make on others? Leave your comment below.

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How Real Change Happens From Within

I made a big change in my appearance the other day. I didn’t get a new suit or comb my hair differently … I just shaved my whole face.

It’s the first time I’ve done that in almost thirty years. Since 1984 I’ve had a moustache and for the last 15 years I’ve had a goatee. But on December 1st, I shaved it all off!

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I had to take a second and third look at myself in the mirror to make sure it was really me staring back. It was hard not to smile and repeat the words, “Oh boy” as in, “Oh boy, what have I done?!”. But I’m going to give it a little time to get used to it.

One thing I’m not getting used to is shaving. It’s not that there is more real estate to take care of now, we’re only talking about a face. But, I have scars on my face from hockey that have to be considered now.

I’ve had 5 stitches beside my right eye and 3 stitches on my right eyelid. Then I had 3 stitches on the left corner of my mouth from a fight with Neil Lumsden, who was just inducted into the CFL Football Hall of Fame. Besides those, I had 4 stitches under my bottom lip and 3 stitches on the left corner of my chin.

The last three scars come into play when I shave. I haven’t had to bother with them for so long, but now I have to navigate around my face like it’s a land mine to keep me from nicking myself with the razor.

Though my face doesn’t look like Gerry Cheevers’ goalie mask, I do have a few marks that ensure I stay attentive when I have a sharp instrument in hand near my melon.

It all changes how I look, and it’s taking some getting used to it. I might grow it all back, but I’m going to wait and give it some time to sink in.

I’m finding I have to keep telling myself that I look different but I’m the same guy.

… And others have weighed in on the change whether they know it or not. Some people have said nothing which means they probably don’t like it. I’ve had lots of people acknowledge that I’ve shaved, but no comment on what they think of it. That’s probably a bad sign too.

One person came out and just said he didn’t like it. My daughter saw a picture and said “Wow! He looks so different, yet the same.”  And my son said, “That’s going to take some serious getting used to.”

Both Lily and I aren’t sure what to think. I think I’m looking at my brother when I look in the mirror and I start to laugh. I’m not sure what I’ll do.

Here’s the thing: Shaving my face hasn’t changed who I am one bit. I’m still the same guy on the inside. But making a change on your inside will result in outward change.

A Christian is first changed on the inside and then that change is made visible in his or hers appearance through actions, attitudes and words. So when we look in the mirror, we should ask ourselves, “Is my outside appearance matching my inside appearance?”

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What outward change have you made that elicited lots of attention? Leave your comment below.

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Why Letting Go Of The Old Is So Difficult

I’m having a hard time deciding on changing some old hockey equipment for new stuff – my hockey gloves and skates.

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My hockey gloves are only 6 years old, but I don’t have any palms in them any more.  My skates, well, that’s another story. They’re about 20 years old.

My skates are so old young people look at them and wonder if they should be in a museum! The other day, I was in the change room and a young guy looked over at my skates and said, “How old are THEY?!” He said it with a tone of “What are those things anyway?!”

My skates are probably about as old as he is.

I’ve thought of getting new skates but that thought scares me. They don’t make my kind any more.

I have top of the line (in their day) CCM Tacks called “Vacu Tacks”. To fit them, they would have you put your feet in the skates and then they would take a heat gun and heat up the outside, pretty much until your feet started to cook inside.

When they were sufficiently hot, with your feet still in the skate, they would but a rubber bag around the skate and zip it up. They would attach a compressor to a valve on the bag and they would literally suck all the air out of the bag, causing the hot skate to form to the shape of your foot.

They fit perfectly from the first time I wore them. It’s not going to be easy to get a new pair to fit like that again. Besides, my skates still work, and are in pretty good shape for all the hockey they have witnessed over the years.

My gloves are another story. I basically hold onto my stick bare-handed with a floppy lump of protection over top. Getting new gloves is not easy either.

They have to be the right size, so my hand doesn’t slide around in them. The palm leather must be very supple so its almost like there is nothing there. And there has to be enough freedom at the wrist so I can maneuver my hands easily for stick handling.

People think I’m crazy to hang onto my old equipment. But this stuff works, I’m comfortable with it, it’s been with me a long time.

I’m afraid that my experience with new equipment won’t be as good as my experience with my old equipment. Why would I go for something new that, in the end, doesn’t work as well as what I’m already using? Being new is not always enough reason to switch.

So I’ve been to a few stores, I’ve tried on dozens of gloves, and I’ll keep trying to find a pair that will work. I may have to go outside of Kingston to get the right pair. I’m going to take my time to make sure they’ll be right.

As for skates, I can’t get myself to do anything more than just look at the display models in stores. I’m not quite ready to try a pair on.

Here’s the thing: Often when we have had an experience with God, whether it is in our devotions, or in ministry, we tend to savour it. We are satisfied with it and don’t want to move on to a new experience that might be different or feel uncomfortable. Don’t let yourself get stuck there. Keep looking for what God has next for you to experience.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What do you keep using even though it’s almost worn out and you are due for a new one? Leave your comment below.

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Are You Missing Out On A Christmas Event?

Christmas! How’d you like the sound of that word in mid November? Does it send shivers down your spine? Does it make your heart beat a little faster (in a good way, not a heart attack way)?

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I had a little foretaste of Christmas this past weekend. It came completely out of the blue. There were no lights, decorations or canned Christmas music. But there was no mistake, this was a taste of Christmas to come.

My wife, Lily, had seen an ad for a product we wanted to get for one of our kids for Christmas (I can’t tell you for whom or I’d have to kill you). The product has to stay a mystery as well, but I will tell you that Best Buy was involved.

Lily noticed that this particular item was on sale, and rather than taking our chances closer to Christmas, she suggested we go and pick it up now.

“Christmas shopping on November 9, that’s crazy!” I thought. Then she suggested that I go and purchase it. Me, doing Christmas shopping in November? Doing Christmas shopping before mid December? There had to be a mistake.

But I had heard her correctly. So, off I went to wrestle me an early Christmas present. I pictured the store to be busy, people everywhere, pushing, shoving, trying to get the last item on the shelf.

But when I walked into Best Buy, it was all orderly, quiet, uncluttered by people or displays of merchandise. I thought to myself, “This has got to be the easiest Christmas shopping I’ve ever done!”

No pressure, no heavy coat, it was easy to get around the store. I thought, “Maybe I should start shopping early every year. What if I had all my Christmas shopping done by the end of November? … on second thought, it’s not going to happen.

Just as I was starting to feel good about my early Christmas shopping, I spotted a line of people. The farther I looked, the longer it got. I noticed that most of the people coming in the store were going directly into that line.

It was massive; the line of people curled around the length of the store. I wanted to avoid it in case there was something catching in that line. I stayed clear, but I kept my eye on it, in case it got closer to me.

I asked someone what was going on, and was told it was a video game exchange. She said something about bringing in two old games and getting some discount on a new one.

As I looked at the people in line out of the corner of my eye, it looked like they were in good cheer, like they were happy to be in that line. They seemed to be excited about what they were going to get.

I kind of felt like I was missing out, not part of it, like I was an observer and not a participant. It almost made me want to go home, grab a couple of old video games (my son’s, don’t tell him), and come back to join in on what everyone else was doing.

But I don’t like lines, and I probably wouldn’t like the video game anyway. Since I wasn’t motivated, I headed straight for the exit – good thing the cash line was empty.

Here’s the thing: Church should be a foretaste of heaven, with fellowship, joyful singing, gratefulness, connecting with God. If church isn’t a glimpse of heaven for you, are you participating in such a way to bring it about?

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What do you need to motivate you to make your church experience a foretaste of heaven? Leave your comment below.

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Four Attitudes that Control Your Actions

I’ve been doing a lot of highway driving lately and it may be affecting my attitude. I’ve developed a bad attitude toward cruise control in cars.

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Maybe drivers just need some lessons on how to use cruise control properly – especially in traffic (and where can you drive without traffic?!). Numerous times this last week, I have found myself behind someone who has their cruise control set for about 5 kilometres slower than I’ve been driving.

I know, it could be a sign to me to slow down. Maybe I shouldn’t be such a “lead foot Larry”. But on the other hand, maybe those cruise control people should just get out of my way!

I’m not bitter that I don’t have cruise control, I just wish people knew how to use it. If you have your cruise set, you really should drive in the right lane. If you want to drive in the left lane, take the cruise off.

It’s not that hard a thing to do. With only a touch of the brake, you can get back in control of your gas pedal again. How hard can that be? Judging from the drivers I’ve been behind, people are able to find their brake pedal way too often!

What really bugs me is when someone tries to pass another vehicle with their cruise control on. It’s so painful to be behind them; it drives me crazy! They try to pass someone who is going only about two kilometres slower so it takes them five minutes to make the move.

It’s like when a truck pulls out in front of you on the highway and wants to pass another truck. At that point, all you can do is crack open a Dr. Pepper, chow down on some chips or licorice and enjoy reading all the decals on the back of the truck.

Sometimes, by the time the truck gets past the other transport, I’ve almost figured out the driver’s first name – I certainly know all about the company he’s driving for. It’s brutal!

But there is no excuse for someone driving a car and doing the same thing. Here’s a tip:  if you are in cruise mode, just step on the gas when you pass. When you’re done, the cruise control will take you right back to your original speed.

Or, here’s a radical thought: touch your brake, step on the gas, and then hit resume when you’ve passed the guy.

It seems to me that people who block you while using their cruise control have an attitude. Their attitude may be “I’m going the correct speed, and I’m going to enforce it”,  “I could care less about anyone else on the road; it’s all about me”, “I’m too lazy to touch my brake or step on the gas”, or “I just want to bug you”.

The bottom line is, no matter what attitude they have, they are bugging me! People should have to take lessons on how to properly engage their cruise control before the dealership activates it.

Here’s the thing: Like the use of your cruise control can frustrate others, so can your use of the Bible. Let’s use the Bible in a right way, and not to slam, to be holier than others, to seem more knowledgeable, or to guilt someone. Rather, we should use the Bible to teach, rebuke, correct, train in righteousness (I read that somewhere!). There’s a subtle difference … and that’s determined by our attitude.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What’s your biggest attitude beef? Leave your comment below.