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Comfort Is A Problem Moving Forward

There is something about old things that draw us back to find comfort in them.

I was just realizing this in the aftermath of Christmas.

My wife, Lily, and I had our two children home with us for a few days over Christmas. Yesterday we said goodbye to our daughter. Now that the house is a little more spacious, I realize that it’s really a little more empty.

Those few days with the family home brings back a comfort that we don’t want to end; we want it to stay.

That’s why we like old music; we find a comfort there that we don’t want to see leave.

That’s why it’s hard to make eating changes; there is a comfort in having that chocolate bar at 9 pm.

We can’t stop time, that’s for sure. We also can’t stop our kids from developing their own plans, dreams and pursuits. But it’s not like we can’t go on without the comfort of the old.

So what happens when we feel a little empty, when the comfort of having our children back home comes to an end?

We suck it up and accept it!

There are, however, some things we have much more control over. It is with those things that we struggle with leaving the comfort behind.

The comfort is like a craving – a craving that is stronger than your willpower, stronger than what you know is best.

Food is one of those areas for me – junk food, that is. It’s hard for me to say no to it. I crave sweet things more than most people.

But in the last month, I’ve tried to cut a lot of sweet stuff out of my life. … I know, this was a crazy idea to have around the Christmas season, but you have to start sometime.

This is what I’ve found: I feel better when I cut sweet things out of my life. I feel healthier, I lose weight, and it probably lowers my cholesterol all at the same time.

It sounds good, but in the evening when I look in the pantry, or on the counter, or if I walk into the living room, there are dishes of candy everywhere – sweet, mouth-watering candy!

Even though I have more reasons to say no to eating the sweets, there is a comfort in indulging in them.

I know I will not feel as good having that third cookie or eating several chocolate-covered almonds after already having a little of my toffee. But you know what? There is comfort in doing it anyway.

… That’s just one example. It really comes down to not being controlled by our comforts.

What do you want to do or change as you enter this new year? Start by figuring out how you are going to do without the comfort you find in whatever you want to change.

That’s the key.

Here’s the thing: At the beginning of a new year, make a commitment to God that you want to deepen your relationship with Him. To do that it will mean you have to make some changes that will most likely include doing away with some comforts. Figure out how you will put those particular comforts behind you so that you are free to move forward.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What is one of your comforts you don’t want to part with? Leave your comments below.

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Has A Problem Got You Stalled?

This week I had a problem that put me in stall mode. What I mean is that I couldn’t go forward or backward until I figured out my problem.

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Another time this happened to me was when I was finishing our basement. I had framed a few walls but then I got to a section that I didn’t know what to do with.

So I left it; I was stalled. I didn’t do any work on the basement for about a month. I just didn’t know how to proceed.

Finally Lily said, “That’s enough!” and she got a guy in and paid him to finish the framing.

I didn’t solve my problem, but the problem got solved.

It worked out great in that instance, but what if you can’t just turn your problem over to someone else? What if you are the only one who must solve the problem?

I ran into that this week working on my sermon. I got to a spot and realized that I wasn’t sure what the text was really saying.

I re-read the text over and over, looked at all the commentaries, and checked various translations of the Bible to get a different perspective on the text. I even listened to a guy preach a sermon on that text.

But nothing seemed to help me solve my problem. In all my research, they hinted at answering my issue but nothing I read or listened to gave a definitive answer.

It was like they all beat around the bush on the subject.

Still I couldn’t move forward on my sermon until I solved my question about the text.

I felt handcuffed, in prison, unable to free myself from my cell. It was like I was paralyzed and couldn’t move.

I couldn’t enjoy anything; my mind kept coming back to the subject. I was discouraged, filled with doubt. I was down, really down.

My wife, Lily, and I went to a hockey game to get my mind off my problem, to brighten my day.

The game was great; it was exciting. Our team won, but I still had my problem churning inside of me, not letting me escape its clutches.

I felt like Jonah in the Bible – no matter how far I ran from my trouble, I couldn’t outrun it; I couldn’t escape it.

I needed to preach something on Sunday regardless of whether or not I solved the text. That deadline only added to my tension.

What I was looking for was a definitive response to the text from a respected (by me) Bible scholar. And there wasn’t one to be found.

And that’s what froze me. I didn’t trust my interpretation. I didn’t want to risk that I might be wrong.

It’s a tough place to be in when you are unsure of yourself and are afraid of making a mistake. It’s a lonely place to be, with no hope on the horizon.

Here’s the thing: We all find ourselves in that place at one time or another. It’s a tough place to be in, but God can solve your problem if you will ask Him. Listen to His solution and then, in confidence or trepidation, follow through on His solution. For me the confidence came as I followed through.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What has paralyzed you in the past? How did you get unstuck? Leave your comment below.

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How To Get Your Email Inbox To Zero

I have an email problem like many people do. I have too many and my inbox just keeps getting bigger.

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I need to do something with my unruly inbox. I have hundreds of emails in it and it keeps growing.

I could give up and get a new email address, cancel my present one and start fresh. But that would cause all kinds of problems and it would just mean I would start accumulating email in a new inbox.

My real problem is not that I get too many emails in a day – I don’t think that’s anybody’s problem. We can always delete those little suckers in an instant.

I can usually tell by the subject line if I don’t need to read an email. I can then hit delete faster than the pictures and graphics can load on my screen.

Getting rid of my unwanted email is not a big deal. My real problem lies in two other areas:

First there is the issue of what to do with emails that I need to act on or follow up on later.

I stare at those messages, some with grammatical and spelling issues (I’m one to talk), and they dare me to put them in some folder or clip them to some app that I will forget about in a day.

I get uneasy touching them because I know if I move them out of my inbox I’ll forget to respond, or follow up, or remember the details. So I just keep them in my inbox; it’s safer that way. But it’s bulking up my mail program in the mean time.

My other problem area is in saying goodbye to my correspondence for good. When I’ve dealt with an email, or responded, and all the action is complete, I still think I might need to refer to it some day.

So I put it in the trash but I don’t empty the trash. I have over 14,000 emails in my trash!

And then, just in case I need to refer to an email I sent, I don’t make them disappear forever either. I have over 4,000 sent emails in that folder!

I might need some psychiatric help on this. Maybe I was never able to really detach myself from my mother or something.

Maybe deep inside I have an electronic addiction like those hoarders that collect things so that there are piles of junk four feet high throughout their house. Only with me, I have four feet high piles of email spread all over my mail program.

They say the first step to overcome your problem is to admit you have one. Okay, I admit it, I’m an electronic hoarder and I need help.

Here’s the thing: We all have a problem with sin. There is something about it (that sin that keeps enticing you) that we have a hard time resisting. We know we should get rid of it but we keep it around. We don’t seem to have the will to completely detach ourselves from it. Our first step is to recognize this problem we have with our sin. Then call on God for help.

I’ll continue this theme in my next blog.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What do you do to completely rid yourself of sin? I would love to hear from you. You can leave your comment below

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We’re Selling Rabbit Fur Coats, Cheap!

For the last 18 years, my wife has organized a street BBQ with our neighbours. I’d like to say that it’s Lily and I who put this on, but I don’t do much more than clean off a few chairs and roll our BBQ out to the street. She does all the organizing.

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What happens is at 5 pm, I roll our BBQ out to the middle of the street (we live on a keyhole cul-de-sac) and, magically, the neighbours start to show up with their chairs, food and drinks.

It’s not a big event; there’s just ten houses on our street. But we do invite past neighbours (alumni) to attend.

We’ve had the police drive by a few times, but they’ve always just joked with us. Maybe it’s because we have a retired corrections officer on the street, and maybe they have a secret signal (like the Masons) that tips other officers to their occupation. Maybe not.

This year a conversation started about the rabbits. You know, those cute little fury things some people keep as pets. Not on our street! Everyone hates them – even the women, especially the women!

It seemed to be unanimous that everyone was looking for ways to keep the bunnies from eating the flowers in our gardens. Some have tried human hair, moth balls, soap, and cayenne pepper. One owner said she put Frank’s Hot Sauce in the garden, but I don’t think that’s right, wasting good hot sauce on those varmints.

One neighbour has put chicken wire around all his little gardens. Sure he has his flowers, but it’s harder to see them through the chicken wire. One guy sits on his deck with a garden hose in hand and spays the little hoppers when he sees them.

As we were talking, we looked over at our house and there was a bunny hopping up our front walk to our door, like he was going to call on our turtle, Winston, to come out for a race or something.

These rabbits are not afraid of us, either. They just look at us with those innocent eyes, and remain very still like they are thinking, “I can see them, but if I remain still they won’t even know I’m hear nibbling on their lilies.”

At the BBQ, there was talk of pellet guns, and setting up a camouflage blind in one of our backyards to hunt them down, but we never got too far with that. We talked of rabbit stew and selling rabbit coats but these ideas didn’t get off the ground either.

In the end, it was still every household for themselves against the rabbit population on our street which is rapidly growing among an aging human demographic.

It was fitting that, as my neighbour and I were returning some things to our backyard, a little bunny, no more than a week or two old, appeared in front of us and then scurried under our deck. I really do think they have plans to overrun us.

Here’s the thing: It’s amazing how we can come together over something as silly as a bunny problem. God wants us to come together around Him, which should be easy. Sadly, in the end, we often end up everyone for themselves. It just should not be.

That’s life!

Paul

Question: How would you deal with a bunny problem? Leave your comment below.

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No, I Do Not Have A Notification Problem!

My sports apps are beginning to interfere with my work and my life. For some people, it is their addictions that interfere with their daily obligations; for me, it’s just my iPhone and iPad.

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On second thought, some people might think that I have an addiction to my sports apps if they are interfering with what I do for a living. But really, it’s not that I’m addicted, it’s just that I’m connected (denial is the first sign of addiction).

Whatever it is, I really need to get a handle on it. In church this Sunday, my iPad notified me of an NHL trade that was just signed. That’s not big deal, is it? Just one little notification that sounded like a bird’s whistle? There is no problem there.

So it happened in church … I wasn’t hurting anyone. However, I was preaching at the time, using my iPad. The sound might have carried over the mic a bit. But still, hardly anyone noticed, I think.

Later that same afternoon I was officiating a wedding, and just after I said, “Who gives Alex to be married to Josh?”, I got another notification. It was to inform me of the score of the Blue Jays / Red Sox baseball game.

But it was an outdoor wedding, and I wasn’t mic’d, and probably no one heard it. And even if they did, they probably thought it was a robin or a Blue Jay. No harm there; it went completely under everyone’s radar.

Later at the reception, I started receiving several notifications, one after another. It was the NHL Draft alerting me of who got the number one draft pick and who the Leafs picked up. But it didn’t cause a scene. The room was noisy and everyone was having a good time.

I really don’t think I have a problem. If my wife doesn’t think it’s appropriate, maybe it’s her that has the problem, not me.

It all started so innocently with me wanting to know how my teams were doing. My sports apps informed me that they could help. All I had to do was select the teams I wanted to follow and they would gladly push the notifications over to my phone.

I guess I never thought how many notifications I would get. I ended up getting way more than I thought. Maybe I am out of control, but maybe I just picked too many teams and all I need to do is cut back a little. I think I could do that.

Maybe if I choose some times that were off limits to being notified, that might make everyone happy. If say, Sunday mornings between ten and noon I refrained from notifications, even my wife would relax.

On the other hand, maybe I do need to revisit my sports apps’ notification and turn it off – period … to curb my notification habit.

Here’s the thing: There are many things in life we don’t consider a problem – things we enjoy, even things we think we benefit from. But if they get in the way of our relationship with Christ, or if they compete for our time with Christ, we need to stop the excuses and do something about it … and stop pretending there isn’t a problem when there clearly is.

That’s Life!

Paul

 

Question: What perfectly good thing can become a problem for you? Leave your comments below.