Getting Old Is Not Just A State Of Mind

I think I figured out a new way to tell that you are getting old … and it has nothing to do with counting wrinkles or loss of hair.

getting old is not just a state of mind

I know that some people might be thinking, “Well, if it’s not those things, it must be all the aches and pains, or the mystery ailment that can’t be explained.” 

These are all traditional signs that we might be aging, but I just discovered a new one. 

From the earliest memory that I have, I always had a long list of things I wanted for Christmas. 

When the Sears Christmas catalogue came out, I would scour it for ideas of toys that I could put on my Christmas list. That “wish book” was always a good source of inspiration for the dreams that would keep me awake on Christmas Eve. 

My son, Mike, also loved that Sears catalogue. 

When he was quite young, I came home from work one day and my wife, Lily, handed me the catalogue. All she said was, “Take a look at what your son wants for Christmas.” 

I began combing through the pages, starting at the toy section. He had circled every single toy in the book! Literally, there was not one toy that Sears sold that he didn’t want. 

On the one hand, it made it pretty easy for Santa to come up with a present for him. But on the other hand, how indiscriminate can one be?

… And maybe that is one of the signs of youth. There is no consideration for cost, size, use, even appropriateness. They just want it. 

Not that I should pick on my son too much – I’ll do it anyway – but there was a time when we were at Disney World and he saw some venders selling turkey legs. Then he saw people eating those turkey legs. 

He wanted one bad! 

Those hunks of meat were about a third of his body mass. They reminded me a little of the ribs that Fred Flintstone ordered at the drive through in the closing credits of each episode. The ribs were so big that they tipped over his foot-driven car. 

Well, there was no stopping Mike from wanting a turkey leg. And when he did get it, it became a community exercise in eating it. We all had to have some just to put a dent in it.

I guess what I’m saying is that when you are young, you want lots! 

But there comes a time when you don’t want as much … maybe because you have so much. 

When Christmas comes around and older people are asked what they want for Christmas, they all have the same answer: “I don’t know; I don’t need anything.”

I never thought I would get to that stage in life where I wouldn’t have an answer to the question of what I wanted for Christmas. But this year, I don’t know what I want. I don’t really need anything. 

… Wow! I guess I’m old now.

Here’s the thing: Sometimes the desire for material things is so great that we overlook or don’t even realize the other needs we have in our lives. We can be so fixated on and striving for what we see that we don’t consider our spiritual needs. There are two wants or needs that we all have – whether we realize it or not. We have the need to understand our purpose and the need to know our eventual destiny. The only answers to both those needs come from God in Christ Jesus. Receive His gift of salvation and He will meet those two great needs. 

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What are you hoping for this Christmas? Leave you comment and questions below. 

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It’s An Antique To Me But Nobody Would Notice

I feel like I’m wearing an antique and it is only seven years old.

it's an antique to me but nobody would notice

How in the world could something under ten years old be considered old at all? In the automobile industry a car has to be 20 years old to be considered a classic. 

Where I vacation every year they hold a vintage car show where the cars all park on the beach. You see cars from the 30’s, 40’s and 50’s. Those machines are real antiques. 

People have put a lot of love into them and they look like they are brand new. The curves and lines on those vehicles are mesmerizing. But when you look inside you see how basic the dashboard and instrument panels are. 

An automobile can be called a classic after 20 years but, to become an antique, a car must be at least 45 years old. Then to be considered vintage, well, those cars were build between 1919 and 1930.  

At any rate, any of those classifications are far older than the tired, old thing I wear every day.

Antique furniture has an even stricter standard for old. To be considered an antique, a piece of furniture must be at least 100 years old. And most antique dealers consider vintage pieces to be 40 years or older.

So seven years is nothing, but that’s how old my watch is. Even in terms of watches, it’s not that old. … But it is an antique when it comes to smart watches. 

I have the first Apple Watch. It is so old that they didn’t even have a series number for it. I got my watch in 2015 but they didn’t start assigning series numbers to the watches until 2016. They have just started calling my Apple Watch series (0). 

And why would my watch be considered an antique? Well, first off they don’t make them anymore. You can’t buy a new one and they stopped upgrading the software for it in 2018. 

The Watch operating system (OS) that my Apple Watch runs on is 4.3.2 while the latest Apple Watch series 7 is running Watch OS 8.5.1.

You can see why my watch has been left in the dust. It’s vintage, a classic and you might even consider it an antique.

I realized how old fashioned my watch was this morning when I wanted to adjust my activities goals for the week. Every week my watch asks me what my goal is and it gives me a suggestion based on the activity I have done in the previous week. 

Truthfully, I’ve not done well at reaching my activity goals this week, so my watch suggested a lower goal for me than usual. I wanted to correct it but hit the wrong button. … To figure out how to change that goal took 15 minutes! 

Even vintage apple watches do it differently than mine. After some digging, I finally found out how to change the goal in some archive on the internet. 

It’s 7 years old and already a classic.

Here’s the thing: What has your relationship with God become? Hopefully it has matured into a sweet, beautiful, loving, cared for relationship – like a restored 1957 Chevy, or like a timeless Victorian armchair. The great thing is, if your relationship with God has become a little tired and worn, you can restore it to its full lustre with some time and attention. 

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What do you need to do a little work on? Leave your comments and questions below. 

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It’s Confirmed: I’m Old

It was confirmed: I am an old man.

In my last post, I wrote about a decision I made, against my better judgement, to play in a hockey tourney. (You can read about it here.)

For this tournament we were guaranteed three games and, to be honest, I thought that’s all we’d play. But that was not how it turned out. 

We won our first game quite handily and I felt pretty good. My knee felt good, I wasn’t tired, and I was ready for game two. … Maybe I am younger than what my birth certificate says.

In game two we really took it to the other team and scored a ton of goals. Our team was on a roll, and I was still surprised at how good I felt.

I needed to reassess my day. 

I had thought we would be playing only three games, but it was looking like we could possibly play four. Then, if we got to the finals of the tournament, we would play five. 

My initial predictions were proved completely wrong when we won our third game. And in those first three games, the other team barely got the puck in our end. 

Our goalie, who played well, had long periods where he didn’t see any action, which makes it tough to stay sharp and focussed.

With three wins, we were going to the semi-finals and then possibly on to the finals. 

For the first three games we had an hour to an hour and a half break between games. But for our fourth, semi-final game we only had a half hour break.

As we got ready, we heard that the team we were going to play was dirty and mouthy. … We heard right! 

Some of our young guys got hit with cheap shots that weren’t called by the ref. Our bench exploded in comments to the other team and the ref.

Then there were two guys on the other team who were masters at getting under our skin. They were non-stop with their chirps and it payed off for their team.

We took more and more penalties. We got more and more frustrated.

And then it was confirmed. One of their two mouth pieces turned to me and said, “You’re all washed up, old man.” 

I knew he meant to make me angry, to get me all upset, but I was actually feeling what he was saying. I didn’t have any zip left in me. I wasn’t dragging, but I didn’t have tons of energy either. 

Their other mega mouth started in on me too, saying, “Number 7, you are useless.” … I think he also added a few choice words that I don’t feel right repeating, but you get the idea.  

By game four, I was that 62 year old guy who is turning 63. I was the old man who was washed up.

It was an enlightening moment. 

But then I thought, “I’m still playing against a bunch of 20 and 30 year olds, and I can still skate with them.” … Not bad for an old washed up guy!

Here’s the thing: We get chirped all the time. Sometimes the things others say can be hurtful. Sometimes it’s our own rotten self-talk that hurts. It doesn’t even have to be true to impact us negatively. Capture every thought and word that you speak or is spoken to you, and take it to God. Let Him tell you what He thinks of you.

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: Who or what words have you allowed to put you down? Leave your comments below.

I’m Old But Not Feeling It

I have heard it said that you’re only as old as you feel, but an occasional reality check pops that dream bubble every time.

I was recently speaking with someone about getting old and told the person how my grandmother lived until she was 99, broke her hip, had it replaced and passed away in her sleep about a week or so later. 

That happened 35 years ago. My grandmother would have been 134 right now if she was still alive. I was 27 at the time. 

Needless to say, I never knew my grandmother when she didn’t seem really old. It was normal for me that my grandmother was old. Grandmothers are supposed to be old. And no matter how old or young a grandmother actually is, to a kid she is old.

Then I thought about my dad. When he was my age, he never would have participated in the sports that I do now. So, in a sense, I’m kind of younger than my dad was when he was my age … which is a nice thought to have. 

But then the reality check …

I was in a hockey dressing room, having just finished playing. The room was filled with a cross section of guys – there were a couple of teens, a few in their 30’s and someone in his 40’s. There was another guy who was at least over 50 … and then there was me. 

I was the elder statesmen in that dressing room, but that was not the reality check for me. I still felt like one of them.

The reality check came when one of the guys who’s in his late 40’s started talking about a guy who had gone to his high school. While he was retelling the story, he mentioned that he had been in high school from 1985-1989. 

That first date stuck out to me, and I started to think. 

I looked over at him. He didn’t look like a young man. I knew he had a couple of children who were finished high school. 

I stared in his general direction as I came to the realization: 1985 was the year I started as a youth pastor; I was 29 at the time. 

I kind of squinted to picture him as a high school student, but I couldn’t.  

“You could have been in my youth group when you were in high school,” I said.

It didn’t phase him. He started to tell me about the youth group he went to, but I was stuck on the fact that this middle-aged guy was a teenager when I worked with youth. 

I was stunned, shocked and the reality of my age hit me – I’m old! … Fortunately, right then my back didn’t start hurting. 

And then I had this other thought: all those students who I had in my youth group way back when are old now, too. Haha … I may be old, but that’s funny!

Here’s the thing: In my devotions I read about how God’s pattern with us is always the same. The pattern is “out”, “through”, “in”. God brings us out of bondage, through the desert and into the promised land. So, at your age, where are you in that pattern? Make sure you get “out” by placing your faith in Christ, but then don’t stall going “through” the desert – many of the old souls died there. It is easy to grow old and never make it all the way through the desert. Read Deuteronomy 8:2 and seek God on what you need to get “in” to what God has planned for you. 

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What do you need most to get through the desert? Leave your comments below.

My New Technology Doesn’t Work With The Old

Trying to use new technology with old technology doesn’t always work very well. Sometimes the two are incompatible.

I found that out recently when I got myself involved in a project just to be nice. By the time I had finished, however, I didn’t feel all that nice! 

I was asked to lend my video camera to someone for a project they wanted to film. Someone else was also asked the same thing.  

When it came time to film, the person doing the project chose to use the other camera. That was fine with me. 

But a few days later, that camera owner informed me that her camera would no longer hook up to her computer and that the person who had done the filming had assumed she would edit the film for him.

I agreed to help and to get the files off the camera and to edit the video for her. 

Bad call on my part! The camera wouldn’t hook up to her computer because the video files were recorded in an old format.

… I remember many years ago wanting to add front shocks to my mountain bike, thinking they would be a great feature to add.

When I went to the bike shop to ask how much the transformation would cost, I was informed that my bike was too old. The old front end construction didn’t allow for the addition of a new fork with shocks.

I ended up purchasing a new bike with front shocks. It cost a lot more money than my original plan, but the old bike construction was just too restrictive to keep using it.

I was facing the same problem with the camera, except for one difference: I thought that somehow there would be a way to get those video files into a useable format.

I worked on it, searched the internet and found some solutions … or what at first looked like solutions but weren’t.

I did discover that I could buy an application that would do the work for me, but it would cost $50 … not worth it for a six minute movie, especially since I would have no use for the program once this project was finished.

I spent over five hours working on this project that I was only asked to lend my camera to! 

I’m not sure you sense my frustration here, but if steam could come out of my ears … well, you’d maybe have a picture of my frustration.

In the end, I used a free program that read the files and converted them to a useable format … except it didn’t save the sound. I had to use that program to interpret the files, then replay the files while recording the sound from my computer screen. 

It was not perfect, but it worked. … I will definitely tell the owner of that camera to throw it out and not use it again.

Here’s the thing: The problem with technology is that it is continuously changing. If something is over five years old, you might find it no longer works or you can not get replacement parts for it.

God never changes. You can always connect with Him and relate to Him using the same means we have used for centuries: continue to pray, worship and serve Him. We may keep adding new formats, but the means remain the same. God longs to connect with us, and we never have to look for a new way. 

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What have you had to replace because the original was outdated? Leave your comments below.

Old Friends Don’t Get Old

Old friends never get old. Well, I guess they do get older, but it’s never old being with them again.

Memory Lane

When you’re with old friends, you talk about things that happened a long time ago and you remember them as if they just happened. You relive the past in the present time.

There is a sense that time stands still when you are with old friends. Even though we don’t have the same physique we once had, and parts of our bodies don’t work as well as they used to, somehow we are able to see ourselves in alter states of say 20 or 30 years in the past.

It’s a curious thing. But much like the size of the fisherman’s catch that got away, our stories seem bigger and better. They amuse and excite others; we get built up in their eyes … or at least our own eyes.

It’s not that it happens all the time. The mood or the atmosphere has to be right to bring back the past in such technicolour, with such glory.

It happened just the other day. Lily and I were with an old friend we went to Bible College with. We’d been watching hockey on TV and I can’t even tell you how the conversation got started.

But one memory connected to another and soon the TV was off (after the game of course), and we were into full-blown nostalgia mode.

You could see it in the eyes and expressions of our kids as they listened on and on to stories they had been part of – tales that were foggy at best in their minds, but were now developing real substance and a vivid image in their newly refined memories.

Some of those stories will be told to their children; some of them will be acted out before their children with a bigger and better feel to them:

… The story of football games in the family room, how I fixed the score before we started, just to create tension and excitement in my kids till they almost burst.

… The stories of back when we were in school, the antics in the dorms that became legendary at the college. It was like we were the heroes of old, the past celebrities recounting life as it was when they were stars.

Those moments create a warm feeling that draws everyone in the room closer together like there is some secret information that they are now privileged to care for … like they’ve been invited into the inner circle.

You just don’t want those times to end; you wish they could continue forever. You want to talk and listen, and continue to light up the eyes of your kids. But you realize that you’re not that age any more. You get tired and can’t pull the all-nighters of the olden days.

You snap back to the reality of the present, and become cognisant that you are thirty pounds heavier, your hair is thinning, and you don’t look anything like the guy in the stories.

But it was great to go back there for a while.

Here’s the thing: You can remember the past, visit the past, make the past seem bigger and better than real life. But you can’t bring the past back to life; you can’t live in the past. So let the past teach you; let it inspire you to live in the present in such a way that you will want to bring colour to this present again. And may God be glorified in those memories.

Question: What were the circumstance that led to your last memory fest? Leave your comments below.

It’s Hard To Let It Go

Today’s post is a guest blog by Lily Silcock, my wife.  Lily is a home maker and virtual executive assistant for an international company.  Lily is the mother of two grown children and has been married to Paul for 28 years.

After being patient for what felt like forever, I finally have new living room furniture. Why did I want new furniture, you ask? I liked our old couch; it’s just that it was almost 29 years old … and pink! … well, “dusty rose” to be exact.  It was very “in” in 1985.

photo

But dusty rose/pink has not been “in” for quite some time now. I’ve just swallowed my pride and lived with it because there was always something more urgent to spend the money on. And the couch was still in pretty good shape.

But all good couches eventually die. For the last number of years, when anyone over about 170 lbs sat on it, they looked like they were eating their knees! Apparently, there’s a shelf life for couch springs.

The ironic thing is, after sounding like a broken record for years now, saying I wanted new furniture, I found it hard to part with my old pink couch. Its springs were gone; it was not good for my back, but for some reason, I didn’t want to let it go.

Paul and I got the couch when we were first married. I can still remember the day it was delivered to our little apartment. I was so excited until the movers said it wouldn’t fit up the staircase of our building. In the end, it had to be hoisted up over the balcony of our third floor walk-up.

It was worth it. We spent many hours on that couch, talking, reading, dreaming … and Paul napping. He’s always maintained that it had some power to suck the life right out of him. I believe it. He couldn’t lie on it without falling asleep in about thirty seconds. But then again, if Paul gets even semi-horizontal anywhere, he’ll be asleep in about thirty seconds.

In each house we’ve lived, that pink couch has been front and centre in the living room.  It’s been part of every Christmas and birthday and special event our family has celebrated.

As a matter of fact, every year on our kids’ birthdays, after the presents were opened, we took a picture of them sitting on that couch with their gifts beside them. The couch was like a measuring stick, showing how they had grown bigger each year.

That pink couch was familiar and I was used to it. I can still picture Karlie as a toddler trying to climb up on it. I can see Mike and Karlie putting on puppet shows from behind it. I remember both kids curled up with Paul on that couch as he read them Franklin the turtle story books.

There were nerf gun wars that began from that couch, sock wars, and tickle fights. That couch absorbed both the laughter of hilarious events retold, and the tears of hearts hurt and healed. A lot of life took place around that couch.

I’ll admit it, it was hard to let it go. Even though it was no longer good, and even a bit of an eye-sore, I was kind of emotionally attached to it.

Here’s the thing:  Just like our old couch, we can get attached to attitudes, thought patterns, and behaviours that aren’t good for us. They’ve just become familiar and comfortable and so we hang on to them. Give them over to God and let them go. He has something much better for you that He’s waiting to deliver. You won’t regret it. I LOVE our new furniture … why did I put up with that old couch for so long?

Take care,

Lily Silcock

Question: What is something that has been hard for you to let go of?  Leave your comment below.

Some People Don’t Age Well

You’ve heard the line, “You know you’re getting old when…” There are all kinds of ways to finish that sentence: You know you’re getting old when you and your teeth sleep separately; or, you know you’re getting old when you’re the first guy to the public urinals and the last one to leave.

IMG_1301

Well, there is another way to tell you’re getting old, and that is go to a concert of a band from your youth. This week a friend of mine called me up and said he had two tickets to see Randy Bachman.

Now if you don’t have a clue who I’m talking about, you were born before the 1930’s, or after the 70’s and you’re not Canadian. Randy Bachman was a founding member of The Guess Who, and then went on to form another band called Bachman Turner Overdrive (BTO).

This concert was a little different, as it was at the Grand Theatre in Kingston, and not at an arena. It was a little more intimate and wasn’t about the performer playing song after song. Bachman was there to tell stories of his life in the music industry and how the songs were written.

The stories and music were amazing. When the band would start to play an old classic, I found that I kept picturing myself back in my teens. But then I looked around and saw all these old people around me.

I couldn’t get over how many old people liked “BTO”. When I say old, I don’t just mean a little grey hair – we’re talking wrinkled skin, unruly eyebrows and white hair. These people were ancient!

I felt like a kid amongst them. I was trying to figure out how much older most of the crowd was than me, and they had to average about 10 years plus.

I knew going in that the crowd wasn’t going to be young. I’d been to a Rolling Stones concert when I was about 40 and everyone there was my age or older. But that was nothing compared to this group. I saw canes, and there was a line up for the men’s washroom … when does that ever happen?!

During the intermission, I found myself staring at people trying to figure out what they might have looked like when they were in their teens or early twenties. I would look at them and squint to see if I could picture them appearing wrinkle-free.

It was about then that I realized I had been remembering myself back when I was in my teens and, in reality, I kind of fit in with these old folks. Of course, I was on the much younger side of the crowd . . . but it probably wasn’t that obvious, except to me.

I thought to myself, “What happened to these people?” Then I thought, “What happened to me?!”

. . . We’re getting old, that’s what’s happening! It was all a little disconcerting.  But the music made me feel like I was 18 again. Thanks Randy . . .  both of you.

Here’s the thing: Even though we get older and mature physically and spiritually, God still sees us as His children. We need to remember we have that kind of relationship with Him when we are with Him in prayer. Enjoy!

That’s Life!

Paul

Question: What experience of the past causes you to reminisce about how your life with Christ has changed?  Leave your comment below.